I'm terrified of fire. It's neurotic (completely neurotic), but about 4 out of 7 days a week I will lock my apartment door and immediately proceed to unlock it and shuffle to the kitchen to affirm that I, in fact, remembered to turn off the stove top and my cute home will not be burnt to a crisp in my absence. Sometimes I have to say, "the stove is off," to make an audible memory of the assertion in the event that my Lassie-esque fire-down-at-the-old-mill sense pops up in the middle of a meeting or while writing a memo.
Thus, it would make total sense if I completely freaked out when my fire alarm started to beep in the middle of last night. Except I didn't. Evidently my neurosis was asleep too. To address the beeping situation I took the following steps:
1. Gave said smoke detector a dirty look.
2. Stood up on bed and attempted to take smoke detector apart. Realized that the smoke detector above bed was, in fact, void of batteries and therefore NOT the source of beep.
3. With hands on hips in pajamas and what one can only infer to be amazing bed-hair, stared at empty smoke detector
4. Laid back down
5. Attempted to reason with beep
6. Created a pattern with the beep: it goes off every 2 hours and thus has something to do with TIME not FIRE.
8. Faded in and out of sleep, did not burn to death.
Turns out, I have another smoke detector. In the kitchen. Duh.
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