I have to admit, my face construed itself into an empathetic grimace for John McCain when he received the Trojan Horse of an endorsement from the New York Times. Just as the border-state senator struggles to overcome the GOP's perception of his (gasp!) anti-partisan politics, he is hit with the blow of a shout-out among all the news that's fit to print.
It's a sad day when the most well-respected newspaper in our nation is also the most reviled among 50%ish of the same nation's constituency.
As Florida looms near and the GOP race becomes more competitive by the minute, I'd like to engage in a liberal's geometry-esque proof to determine who I would like to see as the nominee.
Mitt Romney+Rudy Guiliani+ Mike Huckabee+ John McCain+Ron Paul= GOP nominees
- Fox News loves Mitt Romney. Fox news also believes that Bill O'Reilly is worthy of air time. Thus, by the associative property, Romney should be eliminated.
- The fire fighters union has been actively vocal regarding the farce of Rudy's 'heroism' during the September 11 attacks and aftermath. Said illegitimate basis for his campaign renders all claims of heroism false. He is, not a 'real number' and therefore can not be considered a part of this equation. (The people of Florida may take for of this for us anyway...)
Ergo...GOP nominees-Mitt(stud-muffin) Romney- Rudy(not as cool as the ND football player) Guiliani= Huckabee+McCain+Ron Paul
- Rush Limbaugh (the devil himself) noted, that nomination nod for either Mike Huckabee or John McCain would be the worst thing that ever happened to the Republican party*. I would argue that Rush, along with Ann Coulter, is the worst thing that ever happened to the GOP. If the two nominees are reviled by him than the inverse property would imply that they are ok with me. They stay...for the time being.
- See already published posts regarding Huckabee's negative stance on everything that people who love political discourse and/or choice love. At this point I would like to create a math theorem, I feel justified as Huckabee has created his own little theocratic reality as his platform and a tiny little theorem is way less outrageous. The new political property restricts the use of piety over rationalism a. Oh wait! The first amendment already has that covered! Nice. Mikey is eliminated for frequent, consistent violations.
- The identity property states that any number times one is equal to the original number. When Ron Paul gets more than one delegate, this property will really come into play. Until then, let's eliminate him from the running. (though he does add some zazz to the debates)
It looks like it's John McCain. Though, I would guess that he would not be that excited about my half-hearted endorsement either.
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